What’s Your Affinity? A Reflection on Personal Identity

London Pride, June 2013.This last weekend was Pride weekend. Here, in London, where I’ve made my home with my wife for the past four years, and in San Francisco, the gay mecca of my home-state. There was much rejoicing: DOMA has been struck down, Prop 8 undone, marriages newly made, and a happy one (ours) still going strong.

My pride in our community, in our commitment to gaining human rights under the eyes of the law, was fit to burst these past few days. As part of the process, I’ve looked back on what has brought  me to this specific place in my life, and I was reminded of something I’d written earlier this spring on identity, and the crazy intersections of those identities that we all live with each day.

Here it is, for you to enjoy. With love.

Affinities – A Personal Reflection on Identity

Some people have coming out stories that begin before the age of five. Some say they just knew they were different, that they weren’t like other boys and girls. I identified as a girl, but the categories of ‘boy’ and ‘girl’ only appeared to represent different power positions in a country where the news still celebrated ‘The First Female Astronaut’ and ‘The First Female Poet Laureate.’ In other words, I knew I was a girl who would sometimes be challenged for being different.

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